Um! Pak! Tok! Tugush! Ka-blog!

I’ve always wanted a beautiful beach wedding, not bongga but something nice and intimate that guests will still talk about even after the day itself. But I never thought I could do it for a half-a-million budget.

At kung kaya kong pag-isipan at i-organize ang kasal ko (almost single-handedly), siguro kaya ko rin i-karir ang kasal ng iba. Ang tanong, if I would have the same passion and time for it.

For someone na super OC and detail-oriented, I’d like to believe I didn’t even become the proverbial Bridezilla. I kept all the stress and pressure inside our condo and sometimes, threw fits in front of Armin, haha!

And ako lang ata ang bride na kilala kong ‘di umattend ni isa mang wedding expo. I just read a handful of bridal mags na puro pa old issues and I built from there.

The following are but my simple tips to would-be brides, and sige na nga, grooms na rin. 

Labor of love ang wedding na itu. Literally.

I. The 4 Ds of a Nice Wedding

a.   Divisoria
• Do not dare raise those eyebrows at humble Divi. For underneath all the filth, grime, rotten smell and throngs of people is a haven of cheap but nice wedding finds. Do check out especially, Tabora and Ilaya Streets. Everything I needed for my beach-themed wedding, I found there! From abaca thingies to banigs to seashells. 

• Going thru the jungle that is Divi is like joining the Amazing Race, sans the glamour. But the savings are worth it, especially if you’re buying by the bulk.  Kaya ‘wag nang maarte.

b. Dangwa
Honestly, I was surprised that all our flower arrangements, inclusive of ento and physical arrangements, reached 20+++k. But if I had it done by a professional florist, the ento alone would have cost me 20k. It’s not to say that the Dangwa peeps are as good flower arrangers as the pros. In our case, we had our wedding stylists mock-up the arrangements and had them reproduced. Kaya ‘wag nang maarte.

c. Details! Details! Details!
• The details will make your wedding personal and not straight out of a cookie cutter everyone has already seen. Think of one mother theme, and work from there. For our wedding, here’s the thought process:

• So everything from the invites, misalettes, table finders, seat cards, gift tags down to the signages needed on the wedding day itself were coffee stained and featured a gorgeous handwriting font I found on the net (except for the invites which featured Lei’s hand writing.)

• Some details were for a dual purpose: The beads were for souvenirs & table finders, the wine bottles were table Ids while providing some background to our love story, and of course, for drinking.

d. Do not do what’s been done.
• No staple church wedding songs or mushy numbers for the ento march. I wanted something sweet but not sappy. But I didn’t have the budget for a String Quartet Ensemble. Enter The String Quartet Tribute versions of my fave rock songs and Across the Universe OST. Even MangoRED commented on how nice the ceremony playlist was. Plus, I kept it secret from everyone else, including the groom.

• Instead of table numbers, we had places & things with great significance to our relationship. And instead of just labeling a table as that, we let our guests know the ‘whys’ behind the names. And we all presented these via personalized wine bottles placed on each table (which were my favorite wedding things but failed to secure even one).

• Instead of just having the ento march before the reception, I had the host say something about them and their relation to us, plus a picture of us with each ento member flashed on the screen.

• Childhood pics slideshow of the bride & groom ain’t new. So we put some kinda twist to it.

• We did away with the usual wedding traditions: dove, cake cutting, wine drinking complete with crossed arms, first couple dance, bride-and-father dance, etc. And I don’t think the guests even minded. 

• But I just had to keep the singles game, which every single guy and girl is averse to, because ‘twas simply so much fun.

II.    Tap Talented Friends 

It’s good to realize that we’re blessed with such talented and creative friends from school and work, who lent us their talents at cost, with discount and some even for free! Value-for-money creativity was easily within reach. 

Let me have this opportunity to thank those I forgot to thank during my wedding:

• Jenny Disini, my ex-Art Director partner for the Ambigram FA and Photoshop tutorial
• Mela Advincula, my Cannes buddy, for the gorgeous old school map for the invites
• Nina Santamaria, Tara Domingo & James Razo, Armin’s friends from the UP College of Arki, our wedding stylists (and for bearing Divi & Dangwa with us)
• Mica Tuano and her mom, Tita Grace, for my fab make-up
• Sherlyn Talactac for her hair styling and video editing expertise
• Rey Agapay for his hosting skills
• Grace Rimando and her events organizing company
• Chie Clemente for road tripping with us to her tita’s house in Malabon for my numerous gown fittings
• Princess Caceres, Mac Imperial, Vida Tamondong, Lei Gempesaw & Miguel Lopez, who lent their signing voices for the choir
• Lei Gempesaw na na super-stressed sa pag-bake ng cake pero super worth it naman ‘cuz very well-received (and well-eaten) and kerot keyk

• Tsok Cordero for his fire-dancing skills
• Erik Matti for the wonderful, spectacular short film on how Armin & Nonie met

III. Prioritize

• Prioritize your budget! In our case, we want talaga our pictures & videos to be super duper fantastic and unique. So kahit mahal ang MangoRED, go na! The videographer wasn’t as expensive and I wasn’t even expecting the on-site video to be great. But it was! Jason Magbanua who?

• Prioritizing means deprioritizing. So the designer wedding gown went into that chart. Honestly, I never even thought of having my dress made by a known designer. True, the craft will be more outstanding I suppose, than an ordinary modista’s. But paying that much, you’ll surely want people to know (aminin!) and you have to name drop. And I didn’t like that.

• Chie has a Tita who sews her sister’s RTW designs. I had a design in mind. My gown didn’t even reach 10k and friends commented that it was a beautiful dress.

• We had to do away with Wedding Wants such as a reggae band and fireworks. ‘Di na talaga kinaya ng budget. And again, I don’t think the guests even missed it.

• The only one true BIG gastos in this wedding was Virgin Beach Resort, them with their OA sa mahal na corkage fee (1500/case of beer; 500/5 gallons of water!!!) and accommodations. And of course, the photographer and videographer. Most of the wedding things were made by ME (including the beaded footwear I gave to my girl abays). It also helps to buy your own printer & ink. 

• And although we went sort of 30k-overbudget, still ain’t bad for an out-of-town wedding. ‘Di pa rin sya OA sa gastos. 

But as of writing, wala na akong pambili ng Christmas gifts…

Side Comment:

Two major wedding stressors (aside from money): 

1. Guest List. I don’t even have to elaborate on how many fights this simple list have caused between couples, in-laws and friends. But it’s probably more complex than you might think. It’s sensitive in a way because it mirrors the important (and the-not-so) people in your lives. To add to the stress, every people on that list come with a price.

2. Guests. We Pinoys do not fully understand (or care about) the concept of RSVP. Kelangan pa i-spell out: Respond Sana Very Please!

‘Di ko alam kung nahihiyang mag-NO or nagtitipid sa text or sadyang deadma. 

To those who confirmed but were a no-show (except for a few who were considerate enough to text me na they can’t make it, eventhough too late na to cancel with the caterer, I appreciate the gesture), you’ll know what I’m talking about when it’s your turn to get married. And to those who didn’t RSVP but showed up…ewan.

A friend told me na you’ll know your true friends via those people who put money and effort to be there at your wedding because Laiya isn’t near; and those who cared enough to tell you they couldn’t come. (May poot…?)